Blind Rage
by kcb500
Summary: Jayfeather has finally had enough. He is sick and tired of being insulted and treated differently just because he's blind. When Sol makes him an offer to regain his site, how far will Jayfeather be willing to go?
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter 1**

**I hate my life. It gets so tiring being judged for something that I have absolutely no control over. I may not be able to see the looks, or hear the things they say about me, but I know that they happen.**

**The most ridicules thing? The fact that the source of their prejudice towards me is over something completely out of my control. I hate the way they treat me, it's as if I'm not even one of their own Clanmates. As if I'd be worth more as a dead body.**

**It drives me insane. I work harder than anyone in the Clan to prove my worthiness, but it simply is not enough.**

**The only reason I stay sane is my kin. While everyone else may treat me differently, they accept me even though I'm different. They never judge me for what I cannot control and always understand. Sometimes I wonder what my life would be like without them, and it's not a very pretty picture. Certainly not something you would want to see.**

**Nonetheless, my life would still be better if I could get rid of this difference. I would be accepted then. Know what it was like to be normal for once.**

**But I understand this is impossible. At the same time though I would be willing to do anything to be like everyone else.**

**Anything.**

Very short first chapter, I know. Trust me the rest of them won't be this short and they won't be written like this. This is a prologue of sorts. Leave me a review telling me what you think of the idea of this story!


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

Jayfeather sifted through the pile of herbs in front of him, searching for juniper berries. Mousefur had complained about a bellyache a little while earlier and Jayfeather decided the berries would be the best remedy.

"Jayfeather, Mousefur says she needs something _now_." Jayfeather scented Cinderheart as she dipped her head into his den.

Jayfeather's fur bristled and he bit back a sharp retort. He hated it when cats were impatient with him, but he knew there was no sense snapping at Cinderheart. She was simply the messenger. "Tell her I'll be right there," he ordered and listened as she headed off towards the elder's den to reassure Mousefur.

He sighed and returned once again to his search. Finally he felt the smooth shape of a berry, and sure enough it was juniper. He collected as much as he figured Mousefur would need and stepped out of his den. He took a step forward but accidentally ran into Lionblaze and knocked the both of them over.

Lionblaze let out a hiss of annoyance. "Watch where you're going!" Jayfeather could feel emotions rolling off of his brother in waves; surely Jayfeather couldn't have upset him that badly. Something else must have been bothering the warrior before he ran into Jayfeather.

Nonetheless, Lionblaze's remark still irritated Jayfeather and he spat back a response. "If you haven't noticed I'm blind. Besides, if you'd been paying attention you could have gotten out of my way!"

Lionblaze got up to his feet. "Why is it my duty to get out of your way? Being blind isn't an excuse for not paying attention.

Now Jayfeather was on his feet too and his pelt was bristling. How dare Lionblaze make such an ignorant comment! "You have no idea what it's like to be blind!" Jayfeather snarled. "You never will have any idea; I'd kill to be able to see!" He continued, "Do you think it's easy for me? Being so different than everyone else? Being treated differently than everyone else? You're my brother for StarClan's sake; I'd expect you to give me a little grace!"

Lionblaze started to protest but Jayfeather cut him off. "Forget it. I don't want to hear your pathetic excuses." He shouldered his way past Lionblaze and headed towards the camp entrance. He threw one last look at his brother and barred his teeth at him before racing off into the woods.

….

Jayfeather stopped to catch his breath. He wasn't sure how long he'd been running, and he wasn't sure where he was. _This is just great! _He thought bitterly and attacked the nearest tree, scoring his claws against the trunk repeatedly to get let out his aggression. A voice behind him nearly made him jump.

"Jayfeather, it's been a long time. I didn't expect I would ever meet you again." Jayfeather recognized the deep voice anywhere. It belonged to Sol, the cat who had tried to use him and Lionblaze to gain control over the Clans.

Jayfeather immediately turned to face him. "What are you doing here, foxdung?" He hissed. "I thought I'd seen the last of you."

"Actually, I've been meaning to talk with you." Sol meowed. Jayfeather tried to read Sol's thoughts, but he wasn't surprised when he couldn't. He shivered. _There's something not right about this cat._

He growled back his reply, "If you don't have bees for brains you'll get lost before I make you." He hoped he sounded more intimidating than he felt. He knew if he actually tried to fight Sol he would lose miserably. _Another reason why being blind is a curse. _He would still leave Sol with some wounds to remember him by.

Sol ignored his warning and instead stepped closer to him. Jayfeather tried to back up but the tree behind him stopped him. Sol had him trapped. Jayfeather dropped down into a hunter's crouch with his ears lain back. He hissed a warning at Sol.

Sol shook his head. "I have no wish to harm you. Actually, I wanted to make you an offer."

Jayfeather stood up slowly, but he was still suspicious of Sol. If there was anything he had learned from his time with Sol, it was that he couldn't be trusted. "What kind of offer?" He asked cautiously.

"An offer to regain your sight."

Jayfeather's blind eyes widened. Could it be true? How could Sol possible have the power to restore his site? He decided to call the tom out on his bluff, "You can't do that."

Jayfeather felt a flash of anger erupt from Sol, and he concealed his excitement. Maybe Sol wasn't as unreadable after all. "You have no idea what I am capable of!" Sol snapped. "I have more power than StarClan themselves, even more power than the Three." He added. "Especially when they are arguing amongst themselves."

Jayfeather stiffened. How could Sol know this? Could he have somehow overheard his and Lionblaze's conversation? _No, _he decided, _I don't think any cat in the clearing could have heard us. Maybe he does have mystical powers… _Jayfeather finally gave in. "Fine, but what's in it for you."

"Oh nothing much." Sol mewed innocently. He leaned forward and whispered his conditions in Jayfeather's ears and the medicine cat's eyes widened.

He looked away from Sol, trying to think if it was worth it or not.

"You said you'd kill for sight," Sol reminded him.

Jayfeather tried to block out Sol and think. Was it really worth it? What mattered more to him, his loyalty to his Clan or the prospect of gaining his site? Lionblaze's word returned to him, _"Being blind isn't an excuse for not paying attention. _Suddenly he was filled with rage and began to quiver.

Sol observed him in silence.

Jayfeather lowered his head to stare at his paws. "I'll do it."

"Good." Sol purred. "I'll give you more details about your first assignment later." He turned to leave.

"Wait!" Jayfeather called after him. "How am I supposed to meet with you again?"

Sol chuckled. "Don't worry; the message will be delivered to you, one way or another."


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

** I suppose I spoke too soon about being able to rely on my kin. I thought I could trust them, I thought they had my back…**

**I thought wrong.**

**After an eventful day I ran into Sol on our territory. At first I was suspicious of him but he was friendly and acted as if he was expecting me.**

**I chatted with Sol for a brief while before he made me an offer. An offer to give me what I truly wanted most. In return Sol made a very grave demand of me. He told me that I must kill one of my Clanmates.**

**Believe me, I honestly didn't want to accept the offer, I knew with every fiber of my being that it was wrong but with the way that I've been treated lately I decided that that I must accept it.**

**I still feel guilty for accepting the offer, I don't want to go through with it but in all honesty, what choice do I have?**

**StarClan forgive me for what I'm about to do….**

I didn't get a single review for my last update… :/

So please, leave me a review for this one!


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4**

Firestar finished off the vole he was eating and got to his paws and stretched. He looked around at all of his Clanmates and couldn't suppress a smile when he saw how happy they all were. Everything seemed to be perfect right now, and yet, Firestar felt as if something terrible was coming. The forest next to him was alive with the sounds of prey, it's leaves a vibrant green and yet, it felt to Firestar as if there was something evil lurking in the forest, something that perhaps even StarClan themselves would be powerless to step.

As he got up and padded towards the warrior's den, Firestar chided himself. _Life can go well sometimes, just because everything seems easy doesn't mean that something terrible has to happen! You're more paranoid than a nur_sing _queen. _When he reached the den, he called, "Brambleclaw, can I speak with you for a moment?"

There was a brief moment of silence, and then Brambleclaw emerged from the den, stifling a yawn. "Yes Firestar?"

Firestar hesitated briefly; he wasn't quite sure how he was going to explain this to Brambleclaw. "I want you to lead a patrol out right now."

Brambleclaw's eyes narrowed suspiciously. "The dawn patrol has already gone out and returned. Why do you need to send out another patrol?" The tabby's gaze bore into him, demanding an answer.

Firestar felt the uneasiness returning to him. He was tempted to agree with Brambleclaw and to go return to his other duties, but no. He wasn't willing to take any chances, what if something terrible happened because he decided to ignore his feelings? Firestar had been around evil enough to be able to sense it himself. He sighed, "I just have this bad feeling…" His voice trailed off, unsure of what else to say.

The deputy's amber eyes flashed. "Is it something dangerous?" He flexed his claws, as if he was imagining some invisible enemy.

Firestar shrugged. "To be completely honest, I'm not sure. All I know is that something evil is lurking in the forest and I want to know what is."

He half expected Brambleclaw to call him out on his ridiculous words but his deputy merely nodded his head. "Alright, I'll leave immediately," he ducked his head into the warriors den. "Sandstorm, Cloudtail and Dustpelt, come with me. We're going on a patrol." A few grumbles came from the den but eventually the three cats appeared.

Firestar dipped his head in approval when he realized Brambleclaw had chosen all senior warriors. "May StarClan light your path and protect all of you."

…

The sun began to set slowly, casting a red glow over the forest. Firestar stood in front of his den pacing, unsure of what he should do. The patrol had been set out a short time after dawn, and now it was nearly the end of the day. He hadn't set out any search parties because he thought maybe they were preoccupied with something. But now the sun was setting and there was no sign of them, _they must have run into trouble, _Firestar thought. He made the decision to go out and find them on his own, no sense disturbing the Clan anyway.

Firestar padded up to the camp entrance and began to follow the scent of the patrol. As he was wandering through the forest his mind began to slip, and he started to wonder what type of horrible event would keep his warriors away from camp so long. He suddenly stopped dead in his tracks when he at a new scent. _Blood! _"Oh no!" Firestar breathed and sprinted forward, "Brambleclaw!" He cried out. "Where are you!"

To his surprise, Brambleclaw answered him from up ahead the scent trail. "We're over here Firestar!"

Firestar's fur relaxed a little and he slackened his pace. As he pushed his way through a bush he growled at Brambleclaw, "What in StarClan's name have you been doing all this time?" As he entered the clearing he saw the outline of a cat's body, smeared in blood. He staggered backwards in shocked. "What happened?" He managed. He didn't recognize the body because of how badly it had been mauled.

Brambleclaw sat next to the body his eyes brimming with sadness. "We were patrolling over near here when he suddenly went off by himself. He claimed that he smelled something odd. When we finally followed after him this is the scene we found. Right now the rest of the patrol is out looking for whatever killed him"

Firestar shook his head. "This is entirely me fault," he muttered. "Who is it anyway?"

Brambleclaw hesitated for a moment, and then extended a paw and rolled the body over so it's face was exposed.

Firestar closed his eyes. "Oh StarClan no…." his voice was barely over a whisper. He buried his head in the cat's bloody fur. "I'm so sorry…."

Brambleclaw laid his tail comfortingly. "It's not your fault," he reassured his leader. "He died serving his Clan. An honorable death."

Firestar sighed and his shoulders drooped. He didn't try to mask his grief, _Oh StarClan why him? _"Let's return back to camp," he decided. "We can come retrieve the body later; I want to announce this to the Clan."

Brambleclaw nodded, "Of course, what should we do about the rest of my patrol though?"

Firestar shrugged. "They'll be fine; when they come back and see you gone they'll just assume you've gone back to camp to report. Come on." He motioned with his tail and Brambleclaw followed him. Firestar threw his head back and took one last look at Cloudtail. _I'm sorry nephew…_

…

"Earlier this day, I sent out a patrol." Firestar began his announcement. ThunderClan cats were gathered bellow him and some exchanged nervous looks as they heard Firestar's shaky tone. "When they were patrolling, Cloudtail went off to follow a scent trail and he was attacked." Murmurs of concern broke out.

"Where is he now?" Some cat called.

Firestar ducked his head. "Cloudtail is dead," he mewed solemnly.

"No!" Brightheart screeched and the cats turned to see her jump to her paws near the back of the hollow. Her eyes filled with fury and sorrow. She hissed at Firestar, "This is all your fault, you killed him!"

The words stung Firestar, and he struggled to keep his composure. "He died an honorable death serving his Clan," he repeated the words of Brambleclaw through gritted teeth. His heart ached at the thought of Cloudtail dying, but his feelings must pale in comparison to Brightheart's, she was after all Cloudtail's mate. "I'm sorry for your loss, but his death doesn't just hurt you. He was my nephew."

Brightheart opened her mouth to snap back a reply, but a queen had padded up to her and began to guide her away from the clearing, murmuring things into her ear. Brightheart threw one last ugly look at Firestar before disappearing into the nursery. Firestar wished that he could go bundle up in his den, and forget all of this. But no, his Clan needed him more now than ever.

"What happened to the killer?" Daisy demanded from the crowd.

Firestar felt fear flood him, but he ignored the feeling and stared directly into Daisy's eyes as he replied. "I do not know as of this moment."

Panic stricken calls began to emit from the warriors. "What? How can you not know? What if they decide to kill another one of us!"

Firestar attempted to calm them, "Don't worry!" He shouted over their wails. "Right now we have a patrol out there searching for the killer right now, and when they find whoever is responsible for this, they will be punished accordingly. You can all return to your duties now."

A few cats still muttered to each other, but most cats seemed generally pleased with his response and they returned to whatever it was they'd been doing before he'd called the meeting.

When Firestar dropped down from the Highrock, he noticed Jayfeather enter the camp. Firestar padded up behind the medicine cat. "Jayfeather, I need to speak with you."

Jayfeather jumped at the sound of his voice. "You scared me!" He snapped.

Firestar took a step back, "I'm sorry," he apologized. "If you didn't hear, Cloudtail was recently murdered."

Jayfeather dipped his head but said nothing.

"Where were you anyway?" He asked, generally puzzled.

Jayfeather's fur ruffled. "I was out collecting herbs." He mewed, and before Firestar could reply. "Listen, I'm kind of busy right now, I'll talk to you later, ok?" He took off in the direction of his den.

Firestar watched Jayfeather leave and couldn't help wonder why Jayfeather was acting so oddly, and why had he lied? Jayfeather claimed he was out collecting herbs but he only smelled of herbs, why hadn't he taken the herbs back to camp with him? Firestar's eyes narrowed suspiciously. _He's up to something…_

**Sorry this took so long! I've been fairly busy with school and frankly, this chapter was pretty long. (For me anyway…) I hope you guys enjoyed it! **


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5**

** Well, I did it. I killed Cloudtail. **

**Part of me feels guilty for it, but at the same time I can still recall how it felt, the adrenaline coursing through me…his blood seeping out of him onto my paws. **

**I had to head to the stream and wash them before I got back to camp. When I returned it seemed as if everything went perfectly. I chatted with the Clan leader briefly and then returned to my den. **

**Now I'm wondering if anyone will suspect me. I doubt it though; I'd be the last one on their minds. **

**Soon I will go to see Sol, and tell him about my success. I hope he doesn't have any more "missions" for me.**

**Killing is a risky business.**


End file.
